So Help Me God
by
Rose Flores - Martinez
Preface
The world is a stage
We play different roles
Everyone has a task
We are all important
We will do our best
I will do my best
So help us, God
So help me, God.
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8
There is a time for everything:
A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant
A time to harvest
A time to kill
A time to heal
A time to destroy
A time to rebuild
A time to cry
A time to laugh
A time to grieve
A time to dance
A time for scattering stones
A time for gathering stones
A time to hug
A time not to hug
A time to find
A time to lose
A time for keeping
A time for throwing away
A time to tear
A time to repair
A time to be quiet
A time to speak up
A time for loving
A time for hating
A time for war
A time for peace.
Contents
1. Work is Just Playing
2. On Career Development
3. What Makes an Ambitious Person
4. Returning Something Borrowed
5. Respect
6. Random Thoughts (On Service, Rules, Procedures, etc.)
7. More Random Thoughts
8. 5 Common Bad Habits
9. Good Habits
10. Time Out!
11. Character
12. At the Juncture
13. So Much Unfairness of Things
14. Virtues Children Must Learn
15. Secrets to a Happy Marriage
16. A Diet That Maximizes Your Work Out
17. Wisdom and Leadership
18. Reinventing Me
19. The Truth and Nothing But the Truth
20. Domestic Matters
1.
Work is Just Playing
Work is a gift of life. It deals with a lot of processes, and can be defined in many ways. For kids, work is just playing like building blocks, doing homework, and cleaning up tiny cabinets.
I heard from a teacher way back my younger years that when you love your work, you wont get tired doing it. It becomes a way of life and art expressed in serving and sharing with others.
If you have work, then you get paid. Of course, the need to survive and pay for basic needs and bills, though the salary comes secondary. What matters is service and making things easy and beautiful for others. It's a sign of progress when buildings are erected, and schools, churches, and communities are built. Nations grow nearer the sky.
If you work seriously, you have to go the extra mile like working more than eight hours a day. Like staying awake sometimes and meeting deadlines and results. It is making things happen and not just dreaming and waiting for others to do things. It is doing initiatives in the thought of creating something good for people.
Work is not being ashamed of what your work is, whether you are just a street sweeper cleaning the streets, a mother cleaning the house, a student studying, or an executive dealing with the poor crowd. It is being proud of what you can do for others. It is not even waiting for affirmations because it is given with affection and responsibility sharing talents.
Idleness is a sin. The devil prowls at laziness. When boredom attacks, you have to adjust and set new patterns of work. It could be reading and sharing ideas, trading small products, or cooking ordinary vegetables, among others. Work need not be expensive - instead it will bring you to heights you've never imagined. The poor man who never stops working will never be abandoned by God.
Truly, if we work with love in our hearts, it is just playing and being happy every moment of work.
6.30.09
2.
On Career Development
What should be done to improve career in the next few weeks, months and year?
This has always been a question. Let us know answers from a research conducted by several people, psychologists, and management specialists, among others.
There are three main groups of performance factors.
The first group consists of intellectual abilities.
This does not relate to educational qualifications even though this is how it may be assessed but shows a strategic perspective. This means that you can rise above matters of detail and see broader issues and implications in what happens. You can think of overall strategy rather than concentrating simply on day-to-day tactics. You need to be able to take account of influences inside and outside the company before deciding what to do.
Then you need the ability to analyze and judge, analyze problems, devise solutions, scrutinize details. Plan and organize. You need to be able to identify priorities, allocate time and resources, and delegate work appropriately.
How do you know if you have done these abilities? The higher up in the company ladder you go, the more you need to take a wider view. But lower down, you should be able to look at your own department or work group in these ways: What is the department for? How does it fit in with the company as a whole? What makes it successful? What is our own contribution?
Practice your problem solving skills and aim to talk over your solutions with your immediate boss. Not all your ideas will be accepted, or even welcomed, but keep trying. It keeps you in front of the boss’s eye and shows that you are worth considering for promotion. Sounds boring? You probably do not have the real interest and motivation for promotion, so maybe you want it for the wrong reasons – status, money or power. Time to think again.
The second group of performance factors consist of interpersonal skills. You need to be able to manage staff, motivate them to work well, monitor their performance and develop
their skills.
You need to be persuasive – to influence others to give their agreement and commitment, and in the face of conflict to offer ways of compromising and reaching agreement.
Then you must be assertive, able to take change, willing to take risks, ready to take decision even in the basis of limited information. You should have the sensibility to show consideration for the needs and feelings of others and must be prepared to change your views in the face of reasoned argument.
You need to be a good communicator to be able to tailor your way of speaking and its content to the level of understanding of your audience.
Some say they’re a tough set of requirements. So you have to know if you have them. Examine your relationship with colleagues, bosses, and people outside the working situations. If you have few friends, many strong dislikes among the people you deal with, lots of everyday small conflicts – these are areas where you need lots of practice.
It takes more skill to get what you want from people in authority than it does to give orders, so it is good to negotiating practice. It is also quite a rare skill to be able to give orders in an acceptable way, and this is another good area in which to practice on family and friends. If they get angry or defensive, you have done it badly! There are many good books available on management techniques. You can try out some of the ideas and techniques in practical situations.
The third set of factors is related to getting results.
You must have wonderful interpersonal skills but they will be of little value unless the company is profitable. You therefore, need energy initiative, motivation to succeed, and good business sense. This means that you are the originator of ideas and activities, you need to produce a high level of output, both personally and departmentally; you need to see demanding goals for yourself and others, and make full use of your time and resources.
You need to be able to identify good opportunities so that energy is used to the best effect. You need to recognize whether the company’s aims and methods are sound, to identify new markets, to be aware of the changing needs and to understand what must be done to meet those needs.
How good are you on this group of skills?
Look again at your present job and department. Try to measure it up in terms of efficiency, output, problems, solutions, staff relationships. Compare it with other jobs and departments. Take an overview and think about what could be done. In other words, practice your management skills before you get a management job. Learn by your mistakes. Keep on trying.
Moreover, one final factor – and the most important in today’s business situation is adaptability. Can you adapt your behavior to new situations, be resilient, cope with adversity or unfairness?
3.
What Makes an Ambitious Person?
These are on flash notes of winners:
From Desiderata, ”Avoid comparisons, there would always be lesser and greater persons.”
“To be or not to be,” that is the question.
“A difference in minutes and seconds make winners.”
What makes an ambitious person?
Successful people often say “Courage, faith, patience, hard work, prayer and dreams make an ambitious person.”
When I was a young girl I always wanted to be first which means, “I must be on the top list.” I loved competitions with anyone, even with boys. I thought there was no difference at all. I thought I could be as strong as they were. I played roughly with boys and I won over them like sprinting and sliding the softball fields.
In the classroom, I thought their ideas were ordinary and simple while I find challenge with fairy tale magic, the possibilities of cracking a mirror, or flying a carpet. “Of course, that was weird. I was happy making things happen, even if it was only winning a single game or topping the academics without studying. People thought I was studying, I wasn’t; it was my play time.”
Some ambitious people don’t brag about their ideas, but most of the time they act. They know that there shouldn’t be anything or anyone to take away their dreams. Maybe as a child one brags, but as an adult one has to sacrifice.
Everyone has ambitions. Each one has his own goal and preference in life. The difference between the winners and losers is how they go on despite the trials. They don’t give up easily.
One must know what he really wants in life: to be with a purpose or to be a bum forever?
Being ambitious is not bad and must not involve pulling other people down. Instead, it must be pulling people up and bringing them while you climb ladders. Being ambitious is working for success. Writers are ambitious people. They want to insert themselves in the record of time and space. If they are lucky, they leave traces of ideas carved on a rock.
Ambitious people love success. They use time wisely. They make sure they work smart.
However, the danger signals! Don’t let bad ambitions overpower the good side. If so, this will destroy yourself and people. If so, these ambitions will pit your soul.
This is the litmus paper: Ambitions must serve as inspirations and the acceptance of responsibility and discipline. Here - success will not be far.
4.25.10
IShallWrite
RoseVoc2
4.
Returning Something Borrowed
Nowadays, saying “Thank you” is a forgotten word. The idea seems strange for others and too proud that sometimes doing a favor becomes an obligation.
In business, lending is an act of “trust.” The bank and the businessman lend merchandise or money in the trust to have it back after a certain period of time. Other entities require a collateral in the event of lending or borrowing. In this aspect, the borrower is obligated to return what he borrowed or loaned with an interest.
Relationships become critical in the process of borrowing. Best of friends and relatives quarrel when borrower does not return what is supposed to be given back while in some cases, borrower complains of the huge interest he shoulders as in “5-6 ” among others.
In our day to day lives we can see that nothing is free. Yet sometimes we should remember to count our blessings, realizing that God has given us a lot. Be thankful with things that make us live the best of life, talents that give us work, and time as our basic resource plus many more. All these and God asks of nothing in return. Probably it is within our conscience to share what we have. Sharing is not necessarily in terms of money for some would comment, “It is always not enough.” How odd it seems we could share and make others happy. In this way we can return something borrowed from God and say thank you to Him.
Point of Destiny
Envy is a part of every person’s secret life. It is an ill will over another’s advantages. It is a bad act. “Thou shall not covet thy neighbors wife, thou shall not covet thy neighbors goods. Some are weak to improve
Here we discover a sense of shame, but the power of wit where we could strive.
3. Thoughts on Graduation
The years in high school/middle school were completely memorable; friends teacher, escapades dreams, fears, frustrations, successes and failures. In these moments we were taught to respond thoughtfully or to react impetously, to be optimistic or pessimistic, to be resplendent. With courage and hope we were challenged to derive solutions. High School played a great part in the formation of our beliefs and attitudes.
I know that today is one of the most important day in your lives. Because this day gives you a choice of what you can choose to ne… to aim high, to have loftly goals, shoot for the stars and dream dreams. Ambitious intentions. And after armloads of books, you have the gift of learning. Anything you wanted to know was yours. Thanks to Dad and Mom for sending us to school, thanks to the teachers for their hard work, thanks to all, thanks God! Walking the aisle is a testimony of achievement.
I sense – I know that hese moment ultimately matter most. Because graduation turn you to leave. And as you leave you have to move on in another journedy onward. As always, there’s a coming and going. Two journeys one must make, one must take to have balance –OUT there and IN here. One depends upon the other. And Graduation is both ways.
Looking back… like everybody else, I had fun in school. But I had hard times, too. Painstainkingly, I made it through and somehow realized my smallest accomplishments.
I remember having conflicts in life, with nobody to turn to. My parent had their own probles and my father expected the best from me. Mother on the other hand challenged me to get busy and put myoptimism to the test. I learned to struggle though and chsoe to be happy. Therein spawned my philosophy “Expect the best, convert problems into opportunities, be dissatisfied with status quo, focus on where you want to go, instead of where you’re coming from, and most importantly, decide to be happy and thknowing its attitude. It would have been too easy to quit but I stuck it out for four year and then graduated. It was one of the best decisions of my life.
Now I’m here and finally made it to the finish.
How about you graduates – where do you think will you end?
According to Dr. Dennis Waitley, a national authority on highperformance motivation, only a small difference exists between the top leaders in every field and those who are merely getting by. There are no real formulas only nice attitudes.
In golf, only a few shots separate the top money winners from the rest of the tour. In baseball, just a few strokes of the bat in a different way separates the true champion from the average professional. In the Olympic games the difference between the gold- medal winner in the the 100 meter dash in track and the fourth-place non-medal winner is often only two-tenths of a second. And so the winning edge is only a degree here and a few strokes there, or a few swings here and a couple of tenths of a second there.
What is true on the althletic field of competition seems also to hold true in every other walk of life. The real leaders in business, in the professional community, in education, in government and in the home also seem to draw upon a special cutting edge that separates them from the rest of the society. This cutting edge can be measured in inches, tenth of a second, ounces, pennies, or degrees. Degrees of persistences, degrees of effectiveness anddegrees of positive awareness.
So much so like my friend Sarah’s story.
5.
Respect
Respect the rights of others and require that they respect yours.
There is a set of verbal coping skills known as assertive behaviors. These behaviors which occupy a middle range on behavioral continuum run from aggressive on one end, to passive on the other. People who behave aggressively trample on the rights of others, and generally get paid back for their behavior. Passive individuals put the rights of others before their own and end up feeling angry and resentful at themselves and others.
Assertive individuals are effective in interpersonal situations because they have a high sense of their own self-worth and they appreciate the personal significance of others. An assertive behavior includes direct eye contact, erect posture, a level and well-modulated tone of voice that is convincing without being intimidating, and a message with honest content.
According to a psychologist, “There are several techniques which will aid you in being assertive. The first is called broken record. Just as the name suggests, you repeat your comments in a calm voice until the person begins to believe you mean what you are saying.”
A second technique which works well when you are being criticized, is known as fogging. Criticism and guilt are two of the great manipulators and when faced with criticism, we just naturally tend to deny it become defensive of counter-attack. An important element of assertiveness is the ability to cope with errors without being devastated with criticism. Being able to assertively accept things which are negative about yourself is negative assertion.
Finally workable compromise is a ways of finding a solution which is acceptable to both parties and where no one’s rights are compromised.
Use of “I” Statements Versus “You” Statements
When someone says you’ve made a mistake or that you are responsible for some undesirable happening to him or her, your instinctive response is defense. Others responds in the same manner. Or, when you send a “you” message where you want other people to implement, it’s natural for them to resist that change, because it wasn’t their idea.
A technique for communicationg your convern about a situation to another without evoking a defensive response or resistance to change is to use “I” statements instead of “You” statements. Central to the concept of the I message is that the sender is being honest and direct in communiting wants or desires. The sender takes ownership of his or her feelings or of the problem. The concept of problem ownership is important.
The “I” message has three components: a brief description of the behavior you find unacceptable, a statement of your feeling and the specific effect of the.behavior on you. Describing the effects of the behavior provides the receiver your reasons for wanting the behavior changed.
“I” messages are very powerful technique for communication without confrontation, but they don’t work 100 percent of the time. Sometimes, it comes necessary to shift gears and move to a listening mode.
6.
Random Thoughts – 1-10
On Service, Rules, Procedures…et al.
There has always been a division between the rich and the poor, the employer and the employee, the government and its people. Why? There are no perfect solutions. but only three very ideal answers which is love, work, and
If mother nature has its way with things like ruining possessions and devastating lives - humans/people can in some way, accept very ideal and basic solutions which is love, work, and prayer.
1. Love comes in service and various forms of work. Pay comes only as secondary factor. Pay is a form of work’s reward. Pay and benefits must be just to both parties. Life must be a priority in any form.
2. There is no justice in slow procedures. Remember slow procedures are acts of thieving. It is stealing one’s time, and one’s capacity to work in an office or his own home.
3. Capitalists and big businesses gain from unfair labor practices. They use poor people and do not even care if they could have decent homes and education for their families/children.
4. Most politicians are usually “spoils,” says Rene Azurin in his book “Power Without Virtue.” I agree that most of them are intoxicated by power. Only a few would be willing to die for the poor. As such, US, the working class and the poor must be cautious in bad guys greedy habits. They, the powerful - have friends who scratch their backs, too.
5. Red tape can never help. It is a form of power play, a source of corruption, and a hindrance for better outcomes.
6. Those who aspire for power seem to show their pious poses. Take note of the Pharisees in the Bible.
7. Those who care for the poor would respect the universal laws of justice, love, and sacrifice. Nature would bring forth wrath to souls who deny the poor.
8. Today, we not only have to know (we could not completely know), but to feel more about the bad guys. We have to correct wrong actions that favor only a few.
9. Good laws and procedures do not favor anyone, it is benefiting everyone.
10. There is always a way to fix things as dawn comes, but we have to hurry for we would not pass this way and time again.
Rose Flores – Martinez
8.14.2009
7.
Random Thoughts: On Service, Rules, Procedures and More
There has always been a division between the rich and the poor, the employer and the employee, the government and its people. Why? There are no perfect solutions.
If mother nature has its way with things like ruining possessions and devastating lives (storm, earthquake, global warming) - humans/people can in some way, accept ideal and basic solutions which is love, work, and prayer. Here are points to ponder from a survey.
11. Love comes in service and various forms of work. Pay comes only as secondary factor. Pay is a form of work’s reward. Pay and benefits must be just to both parties. Life must be the priority in any form.
12. There is no justice in slow procedures. Remember slow procedures are acts of thieving. It is stealing one’s time, and one’s capacity to work in an office or his own home.
13. Capitalists and big businesses gain from unfair labor practices. They use poor people and do not even care if they could have decent homes and education for their families/children.
14. Most politicians are usually “spoils,” says Rene Azurin in his book “Power Without Virtue.” I agree that most of them are intoxicated by power. Only a few would be willing to die for the poor. As such, US, the working class and the poor must be cautious in bad guys greedy habits. They, the powerful - have friends who scratch their backs, too.
15. Red tape can never help. It is a form of power play, a source of corruption, and a hindrance for better outcomes.
16. Those who aspire for power seem to show their pious poses. Take note of the Pharisees in the Bible.
17. Those who care for the poor would respect the universal laws of justice, love, and sacrifice. Nature would bring forth wrath to souls who deny the poor.
18. Today, we not only have to know (we could not completely know), but to feel more about the bad guys. We have to correct wrong actions that favor only a few.
19. Good laws and procedures do not favor anyone, it is benefiting everyone.
20. There is always a way to fix things as day breaks. There are rules, and people have to move freely with these rules. The three basic and ideal answers – love, work, and prayer explain and give meaning about service and living brightly.
Modified for a 2nd article
11.20.2009
8.
5 Common Bad Habits and How to Correct Them
“Good habits must be practiced everyday” parents, teachers, leaders have to repeat that to their children/students/community.
It is not actually bugging people, but reminding them that we all have to check each other. It is true that sometimes it could be an over-reaction, or being too boring, or being too aggressive, but good manners come with discipline. Tell nicely, accept nicely without waiting for rewards and positive responses. The angels will help at this. You know “the power of good versus evil.” That is why people don’t stop remembering “karma,” because there really is justice. Moreover, redemption is real (whether you like it or not).
Let us start to move and change these 5 Common Bad Habits:
1. Avoid being late and procrastination - It has been a connotation that “American time” means “exactly.” Being late wastes the time of other people and the time they could have used to do other things. Consider people who come on time. They went out their way and blocked other schedules just to be on time to meet with you.
Procrastination is doing things quickly anticipating for good results. It is going out of “red tape” which curtails progress and terminates other duties other people can work on.
Red tape is a very bad habit.
How to correct: Be considerate of other people. They are working, too. Remember: “Time is money, time is a basic resource.” Please don’t waste time, and let others suffer time for you. It’s something you can do to help others. Work with people nicely.
2.Don’t litter, maintain clean surroundings - Clean surroundings are conducive to progress. Clean surrounding gives a comfortable life to everyone. Cleanliness maintains a healthy living (despite pollution that can’t be avoided) freeing people to appreciate the simplicity of life, and saving them to bigger medical expenses. “Children become inspired seeing the sky as their roof, the ocean their property, and what a beautiful place on earth we could have been.”
How to correct: Don’t litter. Be a good example.
3.Don’t think bad of others. There are options. Of course, you don’t trust yourself too easily on anyone because there are bad guys. But evil forces are conquered by good forces, there are more good guys/people than bad people. Collaborate with good people. Choose your friends and share to them how to be good. If you trust people to be good, pray they meet their goals.
Chances are: More poor people are good people because they can’t steal, they can’t do corruption, they can endure, they haven’t kept things for themselves, they only depend on GOD as their refuge. They don’t even have money to sustain them. Problems come if they have bad leaders/friends/relatives, then some can falter.
How to correct: Think good of people, anyway. Don’t put tags: rich or poor, young or old, just work together.
4.Don’t be selfish. Selfishness leads to destruction. We share, for everyone to benefit. There are limits, know the limits Each one has to work hard and be happy of each other’s accomplishments. Thank God and others, for the small things you get.
How to correct: Try to share what you hold most. As an offering of your love, do good works or little acts of kindness. Your time and talents are offerings, aside from money. Your work is an offering. We are all parts of one body.
5.Don’t be lazy. If you are lazy, you would like to get something that is not yours to survive. You will be envious of others and you would be dishonest to keep your pride.
How to correct: Find work to do. You don’t always need to be paid for work done. Work will love you, if you respect it and share its fruits. Work will give you dignity, even how little you earn. That is your offering to God, and for that you will be happy and contented.
Rose Flores Martinez
9.
A Matter of Good Habits
Living comfortably is a matter of good habits. One doesn’t have to be rich to feel happy and contented.
Here are a few guidelines to make living happier, cleaner and easier:
1. Maintain a good standard lifestyle you can afford, even if you aim bigger than that. You have to be consistent with expenses, even if you get more income. The additional income can serve as your savings, or a portion for paying necessary bills/debts.
2. Maintain a simple, but clean home. Organize and fix all the stuff in the house and garden.
3. Garbage should always be brought out of the house, but compacted neatly outside for disposal soon.
4. Utensils have to be used correctly and wisely. It in not a rule to let only the visitors eat on new and beautiful plates, the house owners have a right to use it, as well.
5. Scrubbing pads in the kitchen/ for utensils must be changed as often as possible.
6. Old newspapers can be used instead of rags for absorbing wet spills on floors. It can also be used to clean window and mirror glasses to save on scrubbing pads.
7. Spray disinfectant and insect killer at least once a week or once every two-weeks.
8. Food are better stored in freezers. If there isn’t enough space, plastic containers with seal can keep food for some time. Watch out for expiry dates.
9. There should at least be two sets of slippers. One set of slippers used for indoor, and the other set of slippers used for outdoor.
10. Sweep, scrub and fix the house everyday – so dirt and mess will not accumulate.
11. Use the right fixtures that suit the house.
12. After using the toilet or/and bathroom, be sure to keep it clean.
13. Maintain dry rags. If rags are wet, it has to be washed.
14. Dry foams under the sun’s heat if necessary.
15. Discard/throw bottles, things that aren’t needed.
These tips are tried and tested by different mothers around the world.
Be clean, be healthy!
12. 28, 2009
10.
Time Out! Time to Ponder!
Time out from work, let us get something to feed on our hearts and minds:
1. On Humility
The Japanese are noted for their love of work. In Japan I winesses how professionals and workers value their jobs. One waiter even kenelt down to serve the guests. I asked why, and he answered, “It is showing people how we love work.”
Lvoing one’s work is also a sing of humility. It is serving others not abeacuase of the money we get or are paid for, but sharing to tohers talents and opportunities they could benefit. It isimposing our responsibility in serving other people.
I thank thw waiter. Asie frm him, I saw how other workers cleaned toilet parls and were never asheamed of their jobs. Mopping fllors, sweeping corridors, doing chores in the house disposing of garbade properly in school or oin work places are sing of also caring for our environment, S weel, as being humble to accept menial tasks.
2. Little acts of kindness
Childre’s offering, teenager litllte help, and their small acts of kindness are big things to God.
My niced Bea told me that she wants to be a doctor like her mother.
“Really? What about if your patien doen’t have money to pay you?”
“O, I will just accept some vegetabes and some eggs for payment if they don’t have money,” she answered.
The innocent mind of this 8-year old kid shows an act od kindess. Bea, in the ealy years of her life knows the value of sharing and even serving other people, even the depvrived. If some of us can think of sharing to others, and this little kid can, can we not do the same? So be it in our little acts of kindess.
3. Ob Being Generous
Watashi is my 12-year old student. He is a tall handsome Japanese boy, One day we visited a park in Japan for a filed trip. It was so cold and I forgot my jacket.
While we were climbing the stairway to a small hill, he was removing his jacked. I told him he should be careful vecuase the apr staris are steep. He juse smiled. I thought he was playing and getting impatient. I was wrong … after removing his jacket he offered it to me.
I was delighted and couldn’t believe the generosity of this young boy. He even thought of me. I thank God for this little boy.
“No thanks.” I told him. But thank you so much for being kind and gengour.
In his heart, I pray he could understand , how all of us adored his gestures; Generosity is sharing to others with love in our hearts.
11.
Character
Character is the essential and moral qualities of a person according to Mr. Webster. It is what you are from birth to old age. It is what you make of yourself, the automatic mustering of defenses in preparation for a flight.
Life is not easy to understand. We can neither plumb the depths nor pierce the shades of its recesses. Good moral qualities alone can nourish and bring light to the numberless loves and hatreds of living. It was unfortunate for me to lose my father at an early age. But at the same time it gave me wisdom. It taught me to move on and reach for my ambitions. Without a Dad means nobody would protect me, so I have to protect myself.
I grew up with a fist despite my gender. I established my own values in conformity with the universal law. Love is the universal law. A universal law is superior to all laws.
This means that from experiences we can acquire qualities that have certain agreement from the self and its struggles in life. These experiences augment fortune, dignity and beliefs.
According to La Rochefaucauld, a French writer known for his maxims, “ Thousands of people with good qualities are displeasing, and thousands pleasing with far less abilities.” Why? “Because the first appear to be what they are not and the second are what they appear.” Truly, sincerity of purpose makes up character. Honesty and courage count essential, too.
Now the word comes clear to me. I clearly understood that each of us has his own predicaments. In the tests of life is where we get the strength in character and closeness to God. Here lies personal freedom.
Character, I suppose is the right attitude in good and bad times. How far can we go? Do you have character?
12.
At the Juncture
An informal definition of a juncture is when things come together, and there is a connection, then one must act wisely. Literally, it is some point in time where a critical decision must be made. A crisis.
Crisis from the same root makes the word “cross,” is simply being in a situation where a decision has to be made – like standing at a crossroad. Some people cope very well in crisis. They know which road is the best and march along it with confidence. Still some people just can’t do anything. By doing either nothing or the wrong thing, they make the crisis worse.
Here are self-help tips from different people in all walks of life:
1. Don’t rush.
Awareness is the key. See the outcome in your mind and take responsibility of your actions. Pray for wisdom the Holy Spirit gives. Prioritize life over money. Move forward, honestly, in the hope of getting to your goal, but never greedy for a win-win outcome.
2. Keep calm.
If you panic, the situation will become worst. And more people will act the same as you do, or bad guys will laugh out loud. Calmness will attract common sense and wisdom.
3. Get help.
We are endowed with talents as we are different parts of one body. A body in perfect creation of God works well if parts of it work together. For example: In an accident, you can be more of use as a help-fetcher, and let an expert do saving a life (doctors, police, nurse, medical staff, etc.)
4. Plan Ahead
You have to be aware of your next action after. Yes, after the first action like playing chess.
Here we learn lessons. Any situation can happen to anyone. We’re just on different boats and different points in time. Remember: As long as there is breath, there is life. As long as there are good people, there will be solutions. As long as there is God, we will find a way out - in whatever way or miracles at the juncture. This happens.
11.20.2009
13.
So Much Unfairness of Things
There was a short story titled “So Much Unfairness of Things,” written by Bryan. It struck me deeply because the main character was so remorseful. I thought about how situations turn unfair to people who would only want good things in the end, yet, it came to me that something wrong could never be justified – otherwise, it is relativism.
My heart sympathizes with the boy who cheated and got kicked out, only to pass the exam for his father. And then, he confessed all the truth when interrogated and faced the responsibility alone of the act; bravely. His friend turned him in, but there was no grudge in him. Thus, there is, “So Much Unfairness of Things.”
The author’s profundity of idea must be culled deeply not only from the head, but more from the heart. The head could never explain what the heart knows. The head helps the heart in its function to interpret science until its boundaries, and the heart in its weakness, but the purity of thought doesn’t need the head and the desire of the flesh. The quietness of our thoughts matters, for a few moments of knowing reality and life’s meaning.
In my writing career, I’ve had my box of ups and downs. But for as long as I could write – no one could stop me. The stages of improvements make me flourish and rooted to the challenges that go with the pain of writing. And many of it pray for a vocation that would please GOD alone.
Everyone has goals in life and the path we tread are different. There are places that come scary so we fall and even hide. Writers who write about success share that man with his dreams must target for the sky or the mountain, so in case the arrow falls, it might aim somewhere in between than just down on the rocks. Truly, hard work comes with this metaphor.
And if ever there was a mistake somewhere, God in His mercy will never forget someone who fell and cried, but lift him up again. God has never forgotten even the sparrows.
In case unfairness of things happen, here are some advice that could help from the book “The Greatest Secret in the World” by Og Mandino: beginning a new life, persisting, greeting everyday with love, living the day as if it were the last, laughing at world, and multiplying values again.
Life is too short, it has to be lived well.
Rose Flores - Martinez
Roseprayers, blogs
3.29.2010
14.
Virtues Children Must Learn
Life is a merry-go-round, balloon and ice-cream children must enjoy; however at this early stage of life children must learn to differentiate what is good and bad. The adults are the good examples to the children.
1. honesty
Honesty in small and big things are the same. Honest children will be afraid to cheat others because they know that God sees them all the time. If the child went wrong, give good advice and don’t condemn; he/she will feel humbled when treated with compassion. He will not learn to steal.
2. kindness
Being kind and understanding to others, especially to the poor is a vivid example so children would understand the meaning of kindness. Compassionate words without malice will make them feel loved as they would to others.
3. respect
Respect comes with love. This will show all kinds of respect: nature, animals, things, laws, leaders, constituents, work, community. Let them know that everyone deems respect. If you respect others, others will respect you, too. Live a respectable life.
4. love
Love is for everyone. It doesn’t have a face as Pope John Paul II advised us while he was still alive. Love chooses no one and it cares for all. Love is a gift we all have and we could share to others. Love even your enemies, God will bless you much for this.
5. humility
A humble person delights God in all ways. If you are humble, God will add to your insufficiency. Teach your children to be contented. And tell them the truth that you can afford or not afford to buy something. With this, they will learn humility. Their lives will show/give more than what they could speak about. People will love them for this.
6. courage
Be brave. Tell your kids they will not be heroes, but they can attain their big goals if they try and become courageous. They need courage to work, to live, to be independent but loving others. Tell them they have something to show, and that in every problem they will succeed because God loves them so much and their lives have meaning.
7. diligence
Diligence goes with initiative and patience. This means studying/working hard and being busy. Big things can be accomplished in little things. Don’t worry, just move forward and never stop trying. When they study, they will graduate, they will find a good job, they can help themselves and others, too.
8. faith in God
If your children have faith in God, you will not worry much. Teach them to pray and tell God their wishes, regrets and goals. Their prayers are very powerful. If they grow to be faithful to God, they will live well. God has angels for them, and little miracles and great love. God is our Father.
9. thoughtfulness
Remembering people and telling them they were nice will make them feel happy. Remember saying “thank you,” as this is humility, too. If you remember people, tell them they will have many friends. Tell them to pray for everyone.
10. generosity
Even if you are the richest being on earth, if your wealth is not shared, you will not be happy. Life is sharing money, time, effort, work and talents, love, and prayers among others. God will reward them in heaven. Tell them to share to everyone even their work as offering. In the Bible, even the poor widow shared her last centavo.
Dear God, we pray for the children.
Guide them to be upright and loving.
Give them good health and a sound mind.
Let their hearts be pure despite troubles around.
As they grow up, let your angels hold them and
let good people surround them in their journey.
Blow in them your Holy Spirit for courage to fulfill
their tasks and live with joy.
In Jesus name we ask, Amen.
Rose Flores Martinez
July 22, 2010
Roseprayers blogs
15.
Secrets to a Happy Marriage
1. Make time to talk. Don’t expect your husband to knoe everything. Tell him what you want, what you feel. However, if you’re going to verbalize frustrations and criticism, be sure to praise your spouse out loud.
2. Set lovoing patterns. Make your just-married affection last forever. Show your love. Treat each other to surprise gifts, and make each other smile and feel loved; in this way, you may inspire him to pamper you, too.
3. Learn how to compromise. Marriage is a give and take system. Compromise is the key.
4. Accept that marriages are lie mirrors. If you scratch your spouse’s back, he will scratch yours. If you yell, the words will echo back your way.
5. Share a sport or hobby. Find things to do together. You’ll become much closer. The activity you share together can rejuvenate the relationship.
6. Divide chores fairly. Start to find a livable balance between each of your different standards of cleanliness.
7. Understand that marriage depends on how you’re doing. If both of your are happy and busy and confident, your time together will be more fun. But if one of you goes through a hard time, it will be hard on both of you. Try to be supportive of each other. Going through difficulties make you stronger as a couple.
8. Never hit below the belt. Fighting; it’s normal to fight at times, but don’t displace your anger. Keep your fight private. Marriage is fragile, give each other a reconliatory hug.
9. Accept each other. For betther or for worse, live up with each other’s attitude. You can also go on a spouse improvement. Remember that a positive reinforcement work better than nagging.
10. Don’t dwell on relationships of the past. Trust each other and don’t do anything to betray the trust.
All these, plus your powerful prayers can last your marriage a lifetime.
16.
A Diet That Maximizes Your Work Out
What diet best maximizes your work out? According to Earl ( Filipino health club manager of a 5-star hotel), a good diet after work-out should help to burn the fat. He recommends eating food that are low in fat (less 30% of the total calories intake) with carbohydrates and protein, and a mixture of foods that are rich in fiber. Earl adds that a good diet is very selective. For example, vegetable soup is better than “bulalo” ( rich beef bones soup stock). In the States, they don’t have “dinuguan” (pork blood with pork meat) and “kare-kare” (ox meat with peanut sauce and vegetables), two very delicious and tempting meals. “We Filipinos, and everyone, must be selective in our diets.”
The best exercises? Earl suggests a combination of cardio-vascular exercises that use strength machines. Other good choices are running, biking, walking, and skipping ropes. The workout must be at least 65-80% of the maximum heart rate.
For a stubborn abdomen, there’s no way out of it. You simply have to reduce your intake of fatty foods. Also, you have to exercise more and more. If you tend to live a sedentary life, then you will have to work out for at least an hour for best results. At the Tower Club, Earl says members try to exercise at least 20-30 minutes a day.
Earl notes, too, that there is some truth to the belief that dieting only leads to a loss of water and temporary weight loss. Instead he advises a selective, well-balanced diet combined with aerobic exercise (such as walking or running) for best results. He adds that when you exercise, you should reach the ideal heart rate appropriate to your age. If your prefer to work on a machine Earl recommends the cross-trainer, with an appropriate exercise program.
He adds, “Starving the body only leads to a loss of water – not fat. A selective diet is much better.” He also points out that there is a new trend – Iyengar Yoga, which was conceptualized in India. “Yoga is a good starting point for conditioning your body, muscles and joints.
Sample Fat – Busting Menu
Breakfast
Cereals with low fat milk
Hard-boiled egg
Orange juice
Lunch
Pasta with light sauce
Small amount of meat
Dinner
Fish meal
rose flores martinez
Dec 30 2009
17.
Wisdom and Leadership
How do some people manage to be richer and successful than others? What are the secrets they keep? What are the qualities and attitudes they have? What are the rules they follow? How do they work? These are only some of our questions about the challenges of business leadership.
A mythology has developed around corporate leaders, - that they were born with something special, something innate. In the 1700's, America was mostly an agricultural country with small pockets of industry driven by such men like Samuel Colt, Ben Franklin, and Eli Whitney, who were inventors. In the 1800's, business leadership was based was on the Darwinian theory of survival of the fittest. John Rockefeller and Cornelius Vanderbilt, among others, believed that business was about brute power and rules of the jungle, not about loyalty and cultivating employees . This unbalanced relationship between capital and labor created the labor movement.
There was the need for a change. Business executives became more conscious of their roles as leaders. Being able to guide means having a good sense of direction or a vision; it means going first into uncharted territory where others fear to tread and encouraging the troops to follow even through hazards block the way.
Faced with these challenges, many business taipans and leaders did not quit but trusted their gut and forge ahead. Many of them say it was sheer luck, for others it was hard work. "When one is young, one must work at least 14 hours a day," says Ramon, a businessman. "If you work for eight hours only, then how would you expect to climb the ranks? A mediocre worker lives contentedly but never reaches the top."
Another businessman says, "I drink coffee and sit in a restaurant because I finished my job when everyone else was sleeping."
Getting rich is not easy. A noted leader works 12 to 16 hours a day, traveled back and forth, and carried briefcases of work home every weekend to get his work done. "No one follows a weak leader," he says. "A person who heads a company should realize that his people have their own dreams , their own need for self-fulfillment. He has to help them fill their need as much as they do."
Many of the world's richest man, experienced adversity, many obstacles and setbacks on the way to accumulating their wealth. They pointed out that they were successful not only in coping with adversity but in turning it to an advantage. Plunging enthusiastically into the task of personal reorganization and revitalizing the company is a must.
According to Book of Wisdom, edited by p. Krass, the making of a good businessman, the foundation on which his career is to be built, must be the same in all respects as that of every good and useful man in a social organization.
In making of a businessman, and in the course of a business life, there are practices to be cultivated, things to be learned and habits to be formed that are most helpful to success. According to Theodore Vail (AT&T), the following tips are the most important:
*concentration of the work in hand;
*definiteness of purpose and thoroughness in deciding on a pursuit, and in doing and learning all that is necessary to be done;
*observation or a habit of noticing little things - instinctive recognition of anything wrong, or out of place. This is incidental to orderly habit or the result of them;
*foresight and precaution: There never was a successful leader who did not continue all precautions until the moment of success;
*self-confidence, without overconfidence or offensive egotism:
*respect for the unknown: In every undertaking there are difficulties that only a familiar and practical acquaintance can reveal;
*respect for the opinion of others;
*deliberation over new ideas. Many thoughts that are seemingly wonderful lose their apparent value when slept over, or imposed to impartial criticism;
*attention without interruption to anyone who is at all entitled to be heard;
*reciprocity in all affairs of life: Every exchange should benefit all sides, and
*one should always remember that the most successful men have started under discouraging conditions
A case in point of good business sense is that of a future entrepreneur, seven-year-old young Christjohn F. Abecia, says, "Someday, I want to be a salesman, maybe like those who own the big department stores." He borrowed a telescope from his cousins Wenzi and Riza, and the next day had fifty pesos in his pocket. Asked where the money came from, Christjohn amazed everyone when he revealed that he earned the money by renting out the telescope to his classmates on a field trip, for a fee. The idea is quiet extraordinary in such a young boy, who did the trade in good faith.
And a final tip: Never accept failure!
http://rfvietnamrose09.blogspot.com
Rose Flores - Martinez. April 2009
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rosalinda_Martinez
18.
REINVENTING ME
“The love of the body of a man or woman balks account, the body itself balks account. That of the male is perfect, and that of the female is perfect … I breathe the fragrance myself and know it and like it, the distillation would intoxicate me also, but I shall not let it.”
Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass
Many of us wish to look beautiful. We desire to insert ourselves and leave a mark of impression so we could be remembered. In our encounters with life we always ask the questions, “ Who am I?” “How should I look?” “How do I imprint myself a picture that would let others remember me and my uniqueness?” These questions bother some of us, most of us, and oftentimes, these questions prod us that primal desire to change what nature has decided we should have.
With methods ranging from a mere cosmetic makeover to more exotic touches like body painting, tattooing, piercing or more drastic solutions like surgical augmentations, we try to become a new person, even if only superficially. And we are not even talking about futuristic concepts like cloning, or any other yet-to-be-conceived means to create another bodily self through extraordinary reproductive means.
First, we were preoccupied with that part of our body that was quite open to change. History reveals that the decoration of the skin itself is ancient and elemental. Hints of body painting exist in ancient times using colors that have come to associate with blood, ritual and religion. Though today’s fascination with body painting seems to have lost that elemental purpose, it still harks back to what the ancients wanted to achieve – beauty.
It is quite evident that motivations are varied with regard to body decorations. Some see it as a way of initiating into adulthood a member of a group. Or calling attention to selected parts of the body, advertising one’s masculine or feminine nature. There’s a sense of belonging to be derived from it; also a sense of uniqueness. Simpler concerns would be wanting to feel good about the self, showing love and commitment to another person, memorializing a loved one, among others.
It could be an improvement – or a defilement of your own body. Whatever, there’s an effort to try to “personalize” the body, as if our own self wasn’t good enough. Surely, you must have seen men who’d have trouble walking through a metal detector as all the earrings, nose rings and studs on his eyebrows, lips, tongue, nipples, navel and genitals would set it off like crazy.
As for cosmetic surgery – that leaves a more deep and lasting modification of the body. Whether through augmentation or reduction – it’s there if you want to stay there. The historian Elizabeth Haiken traced the development of cosmetic surgery and although she pointed out attempts at constructing missing noses from cheek tissues in 600 B.C., the procedure was a recent phenomenon in acceptance and efficacy. There were attempts late in the nineteeth century to augment female breasts by injecting paraffin.
Now we have operations for just about every part of the body. Eye widening, liposuction, silicone breasts implants, face lifting, nose job, facial dermabrasion, hair transplant –it’s close to creating the Frankenstein monster. Yet the question will always have to be: How far can we look good in our lives?
/Rose Flores - Martinez
Published in Tribune Newspaper
19.
Thoughts: The Truth and Nothing But the Truth
The word honesty is a battlefield of arguments. As there are many fields of studies so are there fields of arguments about truth and lies and white lies. The definitions carry with it explanations and philosophies, even relativism.
A story about being bad or being good goes like this situation: Your daughter is raped in front of you by addicts. You don’t know what would be their next move - to kill you and your raped daughter or not. You were able to steal a gun from them. Would you fire the gun and kill them? How does relativism apply to this scheme of actions?
In a war, there is a saying that goes “Love is not fair in war.” What can you say about this?
Cards are laid to anyone in disparate situations. One has to gain enough wisdom to handle crucial matters. But then, anyone can fail, too. Trust in the Divine providence comes in again, there at the juncture near death – one would think of some noble intention for a great purpose. There are limits to human verdicts.
The truth is leaders are formed to serve. They can never be perfect in the eyes of everyone. Oppositions are formed to check on the leaders, or else the leaders are surrounded by supporters with different intentions: generous, selfish, unwise, impossible, traditional, extravagant, weak, wicked, slow, rascal, imprudent, impractical, dishonest, and so on as many adjectives as one can think about.
The truth is people are made of only flesh and blood, but with intelligent minds (educated or not) and the power of articulate language. The mind works in different ways as nurtured by factors the mould the human being ( seen and unseen). Test where you stand here.
The truth is honesty is a virtue, it can be learned, can be taught, and can be shared. More than anything – it is a gift that comes from God. On the contrary, some people deem to be loyal because they have wicked intentions. Notice the saying “partners in crime,” and “birds of the same feather.” Don’t forget how the Pharisee worked. Their deceitful conduct that hides behind an evil façade.
How about Matthew at the back pews? He was a tax collector and the public hated him, but he went discreetly in the temples acknowledging his shortcomings and tried hard in his heart and soul to purify his life.
The truth is honesty can be unreal, but real if you think of others first and yourself last. All honest intentions come with courage. But without the collaboration and support from each other and being united in a noble goal, progress would not be achieved.
What virtues are you living for?
20.
A Matter of Good Habits
Living comfortably is a matter of good habits. One doesn’t have to be rich to feel happy and contented.
Here are a few guidelines to make living happier, cleaner and easier:
16. Maintain a good standard lifestyle you can afford, even if you aim bigger than that. You have to be consistent with expenses, even if you get more income. The additional income can serve as your savings, or a portion for paying necessary bills/debts.
17. Maintain a simple, but clean home. Organize and fix all the stuff in the house and garden.
18. Garbage should always be brought out of the house, but compacted neatly outside for disposal soon.
19. Utensils have to be used correctly and wisely. It in not a rule to let only the visitors eat on new and beautiful plates, the house owners have a right to use it, as well.
20. Scrubbing pads in the kitchen/ for utensils must be changed as often as possible.
21. Old newspapers can be used instead of rags for absorbing wet spills on floors. It can also be used to clean window and mirror glasses to save on scrubbing pads.
22. Spray disinfectant and insect killer at least once a week or once every two-weeks.
23. Food are better stored in freezers. If there isn’t enough space, plastic containers with seal can keep food for some time. Watch out for expiry dates.
24. There should at least be two sets of slippers. One set of slippers used for indoor, and the other set of slippers used for outdoor.
25. Sweep, scrub and fix the house everyday – so dirt and mess will not accumulate.
26. Use the right fixtures that suit the house.
27. After using the toilet or/and bathroom, be sure to keep it clean.
28. Maintain dry rags. If rags are wet, it has to be washed.
29. Dry foams under the sun’s heat if necessary.
30. Discard/throw bottles, things that aren’t needed.
These tips are tried and tested by different mothers around the world.
Be clean, be healthy!
XXX000XXX000XXX000
This book is for You
With Love,
Rose
Rosalinda Flores – Martinez
Copyright August 19, 2010
by
Rose Flores - Martinez
Preface
The world is a stage
We play different roles
Everyone has a task
We are all important
We will do our best
I will do my best
So help us, God
So help me, God.
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8
There is a time for everything:
A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant
A time to harvest
A time to kill
A time to heal
A time to destroy
A time to rebuild
A time to cry
A time to laugh
A time to grieve
A time to dance
A time for scattering stones
A time for gathering stones
A time to hug
A time not to hug
A time to find
A time to lose
A time for keeping
A time for throwing away
A time to tear
A time to repair
A time to be quiet
A time to speak up
A time for loving
A time for hating
A time for war
A time for peace.
Contents
1. Work is Just Playing
2. On Career Development
3. What Makes an Ambitious Person
4. Returning Something Borrowed
5. Respect
6. Random Thoughts (On Service, Rules, Procedures, etc.)
7. More Random Thoughts
8. 5 Common Bad Habits
9. Good Habits
10. Time Out!
11. Character
12. At the Juncture
13. So Much Unfairness of Things
14. Virtues Children Must Learn
15. Secrets to a Happy Marriage
16. A Diet That Maximizes Your Work Out
17. Wisdom and Leadership
18. Reinventing Me
19. The Truth and Nothing But the Truth
20. Domestic Matters
1.
Work is Just Playing
Work is a gift of life. It deals with a lot of processes, and can be defined in many ways. For kids, work is just playing like building blocks, doing homework, and cleaning up tiny cabinets.
I heard from a teacher way back my younger years that when you love your work, you wont get tired doing it. It becomes a way of life and art expressed in serving and sharing with others.
If you have work, then you get paid. Of course, the need to survive and pay for basic needs and bills, though the salary comes secondary. What matters is service and making things easy and beautiful for others. It's a sign of progress when buildings are erected, and schools, churches, and communities are built. Nations grow nearer the sky.
If you work seriously, you have to go the extra mile like working more than eight hours a day. Like staying awake sometimes and meeting deadlines and results. It is making things happen and not just dreaming and waiting for others to do things. It is doing initiatives in the thought of creating something good for people.
Work is not being ashamed of what your work is, whether you are just a street sweeper cleaning the streets, a mother cleaning the house, a student studying, or an executive dealing with the poor crowd. It is being proud of what you can do for others. It is not even waiting for affirmations because it is given with affection and responsibility sharing talents.
Idleness is a sin. The devil prowls at laziness. When boredom attacks, you have to adjust and set new patterns of work. It could be reading and sharing ideas, trading small products, or cooking ordinary vegetables, among others. Work need not be expensive - instead it will bring you to heights you've never imagined. The poor man who never stops working will never be abandoned by God.
Truly, if we work with love in our hearts, it is just playing and being happy every moment of work.
6.30.09
2.
On Career Development
What should be done to improve career in the next few weeks, months and year?
This has always been a question. Let us know answers from a research conducted by several people, psychologists, and management specialists, among others.
There are three main groups of performance factors.
The first group consists of intellectual abilities.
This does not relate to educational qualifications even though this is how it may be assessed but shows a strategic perspective. This means that you can rise above matters of detail and see broader issues and implications in what happens. You can think of overall strategy rather than concentrating simply on day-to-day tactics. You need to be able to take account of influences inside and outside the company before deciding what to do.
Then you need the ability to analyze and judge, analyze problems, devise solutions, scrutinize details. Plan and organize. You need to be able to identify priorities, allocate time and resources, and delegate work appropriately.
How do you know if you have done these abilities? The higher up in the company ladder you go, the more you need to take a wider view. But lower down, you should be able to look at your own department or work group in these ways: What is the department for? How does it fit in with the company as a whole? What makes it successful? What is our own contribution?
Practice your problem solving skills and aim to talk over your solutions with your immediate boss. Not all your ideas will be accepted, or even welcomed, but keep trying. It keeps you in front of the boss’s eye and shows that you are worth considering for promotion. Sounds boring? You probably do not have the real interest and motivation for promotion, so maybe you want it for the wrong reasons – status, money or power. Time to think again.
The second group of performance factors consist of interpersonal skills. You need to be able to manage staff, motivate them to work well, monitor their performance and develop
their skills.
You need to be persuasive – to influence others to give their agreement and commitment, and in the face of conflict to offer ways of compromising and reaching agreement.
Then you must be assertive, able to take change, willing to take risks, ready to take decision even in the basis of limited information. You should have the sensibility to show consideration for the needs and feelings of others and must be prepared to change your views in the face of reasoned argument.
You need to be a good communicator to be able to tailor your way of speaking and its content to the level of understanding of your audience.
Some say they’re a tough set of requirements. So you have to know if you have them. Examine your relationship with colleagues, bosses, and people outside the working situations. If you have few friends, many strong dislikes among the people you deal with, lots of everyday small conflicts – these are areas where you need lots of practice.
It takes more skill to get what you want from people in authority than it does to give orders, so it is good to negotiating practice. It is also quite a rare skill to be able to give orders in an acceptable way, and this is another good area in which to practice on family and friends. If they get angry or defensive, you have done it badly! There are many good books available on management techniques. You can try out some of the ideas and techniques in practical situations.
The third set of factors is related to getting results.
You must have wonderful interpersonal skills but they will be of little value unless the company is profitable. You therefore, need energy initiative, motivation to succeed, and good business sense. This means that you are the originator of ideas and activities, you need to produce a high level of output, both personally and departmentally; you need to see demanding goals for yourself and others, and make full use of your time and resources.
You need to be able to identify good opportunities so that energy is used to the best effect. You need to recognize whether the company’s aims and methods are sound, to identify new markets, to be aware of the changing needs and to understand what must be done to meet those needs.
How good are you on this group of skills?
Look again at your present job and department. Try to measure it up in terms of efficiency, output, problems, solutions, staff relationships. Compare it with other jobs and departments. Take an overview and think about what could be done. In other words, practice your management skills before you get a management job. Learn by your mistakes. Keep on trying.
Moreover, one final factor – and the most important in today’s business situation is adaptability. Can you adapt your behavior to new situations, be resilient, cope with adversity or unfairness?
3.
What Makes an Ambitious Person?
These are on flash notes of winners:
From Desiderata, ”Avoid comparisons, there would always be lesser and greater persons.”
“To be or not to be,” that is the question.
“A difference in minutes and seconds make winners.”
What makes an ambitious person?
Successful people often say “Courage, faith, patience, hard work, prayer and dreams make an ambitious person.”
When I was a young girl I always wanted to be first which means, “I must be on the top list.” I loved competitions with anyone, even with boys. I thought there was no difference at all. I thought I could be as strong as they were. I played roughly with boys and I won over them like sprinting and sliding the softball fields.
In the classroom, I thought their ideas were ordinary and simple while I find challenge with fairy tale magic, the possibilities of cracking a mirror, or flying a carpet. “Of course, that was weird. I was happy making things happen, even if it was only winning a single game or topping the academics without studying. People thought I was studying, I wasn’t; it was my play time.”
Some ambitious people don’t brag about their ideas, but most of the time they act. They know that there shouldn’t be anything or anyone to take away their dreams. Maybe as a child one brags, but as an adult one has to sacrifice.
Everyone has ambitions. Each one has his own goal and preference in life. The difference between the winners and losers is how they go on despite the trials. They don’t give up easily.
One must know what he really wants in life: to be with a purpose or to be a bum forever?
Being ambitious is not bad and must not involve pulling other people down. Instead, it must be pulling people up and bringing them while you climb ladders. Being ambitious is working for success. Writers are ambitious people. They want to insert themselves in the record of time and space. If they are lucky, they leave traces of ideas carved on a rock.
Ambitious people love success. They use time wisely. They make sure they work smart.
However, the danger signals! Don’t let bad ambitions overpower the good side. If so, this will destroy yourself and people. If so, these ambitions will pit your soul.
This is the litmus paper: Ambitions must serve as inspirations and the acceptance of responsibility and discipline. Here - success will not be far.
4.25.10
IShallWrite
RoseVoc2
4.
Returning Something Borrowed
Nowadays, saying “Thank you” is a forgotten word. The idea seems strange for others and too proud that sometimes doing a favor becomes an obligation.
In business, lending is an act of “trust.” The bank and the businessman lend merchandise or money in the trust to have it back after a certain period of time. Other entities require a collateral in the event of lending or borrowing. In this aspect, the borrower is obligated to return what he borrowed or loaned with an interest.
Relationships become critical in the process of borrowing. Best of friends and relatives quarrel when borrower does not return what is supposed to be given back while in some cases, borrower complains of the huge interest he shoulders as in “5-6 ” among others.
In our day to day lives we can see that nothing is free. Yet sometimes we should remember to count our blessings, realizing that God has given us a lot. Be thankful with things that make us live the best of life, talents that give us work, and time as our basic resource plus many more. All these and God asks of nothing in return. Probably it is within our conscience to share what we have. Sharing is not necessarily in terms of money for some would comment, “It is always not enough.” How odd it seems we could share and make others happy. In this way we can return something borrowed from God and say thank you to Him.
Point of Destiny
Envy is a part of every person’s secret life. It is an ill will over another’s advantages. It is a bad act. “Thou shall not covet thy neighbors wife, thou shall not covet thy neighbors goods. Some are weak to improve
Here we discover a sense of shame, but the power of wit where we could strive.
3. Thoughts on Graduation
The years in high school/middle school were completely memorable; friends teacher, escapades dreams, fears, frustrations, successes and failures. In these moments we were taught to respond thoughtfully or to react impetously, to be optimistic or pessimistic, to be resplendent. With courage and hope we were challenged to derive solutions. High School played a great part in the formation of our beliefs and attitudes.
I know that today is one of the most important day in your lives. Because this day gives you a choice of what you can choose to ne… to aim high, to have loftly goals, shoot for the stars and dream dreams. Ambitious intentions. And after armloads of books, you have the gift of learning. Anything you wanted to know was yours. Thanks to Dad and Mom for sending us to school, thanks to the teachers for their hard work, thanks to all, thanks God! Walking the aisle is a testimony of achievement.
I sense – I know that hese moment ultimately matter most. Because graduation turn you to leave. And as you leave you have to move on in another journedy onward. As always, there’s a coming and going. Two journeys one must make, one must take to have balance –OUT there and IN here. One depends upon the other. And Graduation is both ways.
Looking back… like everybody else, I had fun in school. But I had hard times, too. Painstainkingly, I made it through and somehow realized my smallest accomplishments.
I remember having conflicts in life, with nobody to turn to. My parent had their own probles and my father expected the best from me. Mother on the other hand challenged me to get busy and put myoptimism to the test. I learned to struggle though and chsoe to be happy. Therein spawned my philosophy “Expect the best, convert problems into opportunities, be dissatisfied with status quo, focus on where you want to go, instead of where you’re coming from, and most importantly, decide to be happy and thknowing its attitude. It would have been too easy to quit but I stuck it out for four year and then graduated. It was one of the best decisions of my life.
Now I’m here and finally made it to the finish.
How about you graduates – where do you think will you end?
According to Dr. Dennis Waitley, a national authority on highperformance motivation, only a small difference exists between the top leaders in every field and those who are merely getting by. There are no real formulas only nice attitudes.
In golf, only a few shots separate the top money winners from the rest of the tour. In baseball, just a few strokes of the bat in a different way separates the true champion from the average professional. In the Olympic games the difference between the gold- medal winner in the the 100 meter dash in track and the fourth-place non-medal winner is often only two-tenths of a second. And so the winning edge is only a degree here and a few strokes there, or a few swings here and a couple of tenths of a second there.
What is true on the althletic field of competition seems also to hold true in every other walk of life. The real leaders in business, in the professional community, in education, in government and in the home also seem to draw upon a special cutting edge that separates them from the rest of the society. This cutting edge can be measured in inches, tenth of a second, ounces, pennies, or degrees. Degrees of persistences, degrees of effectiveness anddegrees of positive awareness.
So much so like my friend Sarah’s story.
5.
Respect
Respect the rights of others and require that they respect yours.
There is a set of verbal coping skills known as assertive behaviors. These behaviors which occupy a middle range on behavioral continuum run from aggressive on one end, to passive on the other. People who behave aggressively trample on the rights of others, and generally get paid back for their behavior. Passive individuals put the rights of others before their own and end up feeling angry and resentful at themselves and others.
Assertive individuals are effective in interpersonal situations because they have a high sense of their own self-worth and they appreciate the personal significance of others. An assertive behavior includes direct eye contact, erect posture, a level and well-modulated tone of voice that is convincing without being intimidating, and a message with honest content.
According to a psychologist, “There are several techniques which will aid you in being assertive. The first is called broken record. Just as the name suggests, you repeat your comments in a calm voice until the person begins to believe you mean what you are saying.”
A second technique which works well when you are being criticized, is known as fogging. Criticism and guilt are two of the great manipulators and when faced with criticism, we just naturally tend to deny it become defensive of counter-attack. An important element of assertiveness is the ability to cope with errors without being devastated with criticism. Being able to assertively accept things which are negative about yourself is negative assertion.
Finally workable compromise is a ways of finding a solution which is acceptable to both parties and where no one’s rights are compromised.
Use of “I” Statements Versus “You” Statements
When someone says you’ve made a mistake or that you are responsible for some undesirable happening to him or her, your instinctive response is defense. Others responds in the same manner. Or, when you send a “you” message where you want other people to implement, it’s natural for them to resist that change, because it wasn’t their idea.
A technique for communicationg your convern about a situation to another without evoking a defensive response or resistance to change is to use “I” statements instead of “You” statements. Central to the concept of the I message is that the sender is being honest and direct in communiting wants or desires. The sender takes ownership of his or her feelings or of the problem. The concept of problem ownership is important.
The “I” message has three components: a brief description of the behavior you find unacceptable, a statement of your feeling and the specific effect of the.behavior on you. Describing the effects of the behavior provides the receiver your reasons for wanting the behavior changed.
“I” messages are very powerful technique for communication without confrontation, but they don’t work 100 percent of the time. Sometimes, it comes necessary to shift gears and move to a listening mode.
6.
Random Thoughts – 1-10
On Service, Rules, Procedures…et al.
There has always been a division between the rich and the poor, the employer and the employee, the government and its people. Why? There are no perfect solutions. but only three very ideal answers which is love, work, and
If mother nature has its way with things like ruining possessions and devastating lives - humans/people can in some way, accept very ideal and basic solutions which is love, work, and prayer.
1. Love comes in service and various forms of work. Pay comes only as secondary factor. Pay is a form of work’s reward. Pay and benefits must be just to both parties. Life must be a priority in any form.
2. There is no justice in slow procedures. Remember slow procedures are acts of thieving. It is stealing one’s time, and one’s capacity to work in an office or his own home.
3. Capitalists and big businesses gain from unfair labor practices. They use poor people and do not even care if they could have decent homes and education for their families/children.
4. Most politicians are usually “spoils,” says Rene Azurin in his book “Power Without Virtue.” I agree that most of them are intoxicated by power. Only a few would be willing to die for the poor. As such, US, the working class and the poor must be cautious in bad guys greedy habits. They, the powerful - have friends who scratch their backs, too.
5. Red tape can never help. It is a form of power play, a source of corruption, and a hindrance for better outcomes.
6. Those who aspire for power seem to show their pious poses. Take note of the Pharisees in the Bible.
7. Those who care for the poor would respect the universal laws of justice, love, and sacrifice. Nature would bring forth wrath to souls who deny the poor.
8. Today, we not only have to know (we could not completely know), but to feel more about the bad guys. We have to correct wrong actions that favor only a few.
9. Good laws and procedures do not favor anyone, it is benefiting everyone.
10. There is always a way to fix things as dawn comes, but we have to hurry for we would not pass this way and time again.
Rose Flores – Martinez
8.14.2009
7.
Random Thoughts: On Service, Rules, Procedures and More
There has always been a division between the rich and the poor, the employer and the employee, the government and its people. Why? There are no perfect solutions.
If mother nature has its way with things like ruining possessions and devastating lives (storm, earthquake, global warming) - humans/people can in some way, accept ideal and basic solutions which is love, work, and prayer. Here are points to ponder from a survey.
11. Love comes in service and various forms of work. Pay comes only as secondary factor. Pay is a form of work’s reward. Pay and benefits must be just to both parties. Life must be the priority in any form.
12. There is no justice in slow procedures. Remember slow procedures are acts of thieving. It is stealing one’s time, and one’s capacity to work in an office or his own home.
13. Capitalists and big businesses gain from unfair labor practices. They use poor people and do not even care if they could have decent homes and education for their families/children.
14. Most politicians are usually “spoils,” says Rene Azurin in his book “Power Without Virtue.” I agree that most of them are intoxicated by power. Only a few would be willing to die for the poor. As such, US, the working class and the poor must be cautious in bad guys greedy habits. They, the powerful - have friends who scratch their backs, too.
15. Red tape can never help. It is a form of power play, a source of corruption, and a hindrance for better outcomes.
16. Those who aspire for power seem to show their pious poses. Take note of the Pharisees in the Bible.
17. Those who care for the poor would respect the universal laws of justice, love, and sacrifice. Nature would bring forth wrath to souls who deny the poor.
18. Today, we not only have to know (we could not completely know), but to feel more about the bad guys. We have to correct wrong actions that favor only a few.
19. Good laws and procedures do not favor anyone, it is benefiting everyone.
20. There is always a way to fix things as day breaks. There are rules, and people have to move freely with these rules. The three basic and ideal answers – love, work, and prayer explain and give meaning about service and living brightly.
Modified for a 2nd article
11.20.2009
8.
5 Common Bad Habits and How to Correct Them
“Good habits must be practiced everyday” parents, teachers, leaders have to repeat that to their children/students/community.
It is not actually bugging people, but reminding them that we all have to check each other. It is true that sometimes it could be an over-reaction, or being too boring, or being too aggressive, but good manners come with discipline. Tell nicely, accept nicely without waiting for rewards and positive responses. The angels will help at this. You know “the power of good versus evil.” That is why people don’t stop remembering “karma,” because there really is justice. Moreover, redemption is real (whether you like it or not).
Let us start to move and change these 5 Common Bad Habits:
1. Avoid being late and procrastination - It has been a connotation that “American time” means “exactly.” Being late wastes the time of other people and the time they could have used to do other things. Consider people who come on time. They went out their way and blocked other schedules just to be on time to meet with you.
Procrastination is doing things quickly anticipating for good results. It is going out of “red tape” which curtails progress and terminates other duties other people can work on.
Red tape is a very bad habit.
How to correct: Be considerate of other people. They are working, too. Remember: “Time is money, time is a basic resource.” Please don’t waste time, and let others suffer time for you. It’s something you can do to help others. Work with people nicely.
2.Don’t litter, maintain clean surroundings - Clean surroundings are conducive to progress. Clean surrounding gives a comfortable life to everyone. Cleanliness maintains a healthy living (despite pollution that can’t be avoided) freeing people to appreciate the simplicity of life, and saving them to bigger medical expenses. “Children become inspired seeing the sky as their roof, the ocean their property, and what a beautiful place on earth we could have been.”
How to correct: Don’t litter. Be a good example.
3.Don’t think bad of others. There are options. Of course, you don’t trust yourself too easily on anyone because there are bad guys. But evil forces are conquered by good forces, there are more good guys/people than bad people. Collaborate with good people. Choose your friends and share to them how to be good. If you trust people to be good, pray they meet their goals.
Chances are: More poor people are good people because they can’t steal, they can’t do corruption, they can endure, they haven’t kept things for themselves, they only depend on GOD as their refuge. They don’t even have money to sustain them. Problems come if they have bad leaders/friends/relatives, then some can falter.
How to correct: Think good of people, anyway. Don’t put tags: rich or poor, young or old, just work together.
4.Don’t be selfish. Selfishness leads to destruction. We share, for everyone to benefit. There are limits, know the limits Each one has to work hard and be happy of each other’s accomplishments. Thank God and others, for the small things you get.
How to correct: Try to share what you hold most. As an offering of your love, do good works or little acts of kindness. Your time and talents are offerings, aside from money. Your work is an offering. We are all parts of one body.
5.Don’t be lazy. If you are lazy, you would like to get something that is not yours to survive. You will be envious of others and you would be dishonest to keep your pride.
How to correct: Find work to do. You don’t always need to be paid for work done. Work will love you, if you respect it and share its fruits. Work will give you dignity, even how little you earn. That is your offering to God, and for that you will be happy and contented.
Rose Flores Martinez
9.
A Matter of Good Habits
Living comfortably is a matter of good habits. One doesn’t have to be rich to feel happy and contented.
Here are a few guidelines to make living happier, cleaner and easier:
1. Maintain a good standard lifestyle you can afford, even if you aim bigger than that. You have to be consistent with expenses, even if you get more income. The additional income can serve as your savings, or a portion for paying necessary bills/debts.
2. Maintain a simple, but clean home. Organize and fix all the stuff in the house and garden.
3. Garbage should always be brought out of the house, but compacted neatly outside for disposal soon.
4. Utensils have to be used correctly and wisely. It in not a rule to let only the visitors eat on new and beautiful plates, the house owners have a right to use it, as well.
5. Scrubbing pads in the kitchen/ for utensils must be changed as often as possible.
6. Old newspapers can be used instead of rags for absorbing wet spills on floors. It can also be used to clean window and mirror glasses to save on scrubbing pads.
7. Spray disinfectant and insect killer at least once a week or once every two-weeks.
8. Food are better stored in freezers. If there isn’t enough space, plastic containers with seal can keep food for some time. Watch out for expiry dates.
9. There should at least be two sets of slippers. One set of slippers used for indoor, and the other set of slippers used for outdoor.
10. Sweep, scrub and fix the house everyday – so dirt and mess will not accumulate.
11. Use the right fixtures that suit the house.
12. After using the toilet or/and bathroom, be sure to keep it clean.
13. Maintain dry rags. If rags are wet, it has to be washed.
14. Dry foams under the sun’s heat if necessary.
15. Discard/throw bottles, things that aren’t needed.
These tips are tried and tested by different mothers around the world.
Be clean, be healthy!
12. 28, 2009
10.
Time Out! Time to Ponder!
Time out from work, let us get something to feed on our hearts and minds:
1. On Humility
The Japanese are noted for their love of work. In Japan I winesses how professionals and workers value their jobs. One waiter even kenelt down to serve the guests. I asked why, and he answered, “It is showing people how we love work.”
Lvoing one’s work is also a sing of humility. It is serving others not abeacuase of the money we get or are paid for, but sharing to tohers talents and opportunities they could benefit. It isimposing our responsibility in serving other people.
I thank thw waiter. Asie frm him, I saw how other workers cleaned toilet parls and were never asheamed of their jobs. Mopping fllors, sweeping corridors, doing chores in the house disposing of garbade properly in school or oin work places are sing of also caring for our environment, S weel, as being humble to accept menial tasks.
2. Little acts of kindness
Childre’s offering, teenager litllte help, and their small acts of kindness are big things to God.
My niced Bea told me that she wants to be a doctor like her mother.
“Really? What about if your patien doen’t have money to pay you?”
“O, I will just accept some vegetabes and some eggs for payment if they don’t have money,” she answered.
The innocent mind of this 8-year old kid shows an act od kindess. Bea, in the ealy years of her life knows the value of sharing and even serving other people, even the depvrived. If some of us can think of sharing to others, and this little kid can, can we not do the same? So be it in our little acts of kindess.
3. Ob Being Generous
Watashi is my 12-year old student. He is a tall handsome Japanese boy, One day we visited a park in Japan for a filed trip. It was so cold and I forgot my jacket.
While we were climbing the stairway to a small hill, he was removing his jacked. I told him he should be careful vecuase the apr staris are steep. He juse smiled. I thought he was playing and getting impatient. I was wrong … after removing his jacket he offered it to me.
I was delighted and couldn’t believe the generosity of this young boy. He even thought of me. I thank God for this little boy.
“No thanks.” I told him. But thank you so much for being kind and gengour.
In his heart, I pray he could understand , how all of us adored his gestures; Generosity is sharing to others with love in our hearts.
11.
Character
Character is the essential and moral qualities of a person according to Mr. Webster. It is what you are from birth to old age. It is what you make of yourself, the automatic mustering of defenses in preparation for a flight.
Life is not easy to understand. We can neither plumb the depths nor pierce the shades of its recesses. Good moral qualities alone can nourish and bring light to the numberless loves and hatreds of living. It was unfortunate for me to lose my father at an early age. But at the same time it gave me wisdom. It taught me to move on and reach for my ambitions. Without a Dad means nobody would protect me, so I have to protect myself.
I grew up with a fist despite my gender. I established my own values in conformity with the universal law. Love is the universal law. A universal law is superior to all laws.
This means that from experiences we can acquire qualities that have certain agreement from the self and its struggles in life. These experiences augment fortune, dignity and beliefs.
According to La Rochefaucauld, a French writer known for his maxims, “ Thousands of people with good qualities are displeasing, and thousands pleasing with far less abilities.” Why? “Because the first appear to be what they are not and the second are what they appear.” Truly, sincerity of purpose makes up character. Honesty and courage count essential, too.
Now the word comes clear to me. I clearly understood that each of us has his own predicaments. In the tests of life is where we get the strength in character and closeness to God. Here lies personal freedom.
Character, I suppose is the right attitude in good and bad times. How far can we go? Do you have character?
12.
At the Juncture
An informal definition of a juncture is when things come together, and there is a connection, then one must act wisely. Literally, it is some point in time where a critical decision must be made. A crisis.
Crisis from the same root makes the word “cross,” is simply being in a situation where a decision has to be made – like standing at a crossroad. Some people cope very well in crisis. They know which road is the best and march along it with confidence. Still some people just can’t do anything. By doing either nothing or the wrong thing, they make the crisis worse.
Here are self-help tips from different people in all walks of life:
1. Don’t rush.
Awareness is the key. See the outcome in your mind and take responsibility of your actions. Pray for wisdom the Holy Spirit gives. Prioritize life over money. Move forward, honestly, in the hope of getting to your goal, but never greedy for a win-win outcome.
2. Keep calm.
If you panic, the situation will become worst. And more people will act the same as you do, or bad guys will laugh out loud. Calmness will attract common sense and wisdom.
3. Get help.
We are endowed with talents as we are different parts of one body. A body in perfect creation of God works well if parts of it work together. For example: In an accident, you can be more of use as a help-fetcher, and let an expert do saving a life (doctors, police, nurse, medical staff, etc.)
4. Plan Ahead
You have to be aware of your next action after. Yes, after the first action like playing chess.
Here we learn lessons. Any situation can happen to anyone. We’re just on different boats and different points in time. Remember: As long as there is breath, there is life. As long as there are good people, there will be solutions. As long as there is God, we will find a way out - in whatever way or miracles at the juncture. This happens.
11.20.2009
13.
So Much Unfairness of Things
There was a short story titled “So Much Unfairness of Things,” written by Bryan. It struck me deeply because the main character was so remorseful. I thought about how situations turn unfair to people who would only want good things in the end, yet, it came to me that something wrong could never be justified – otherwise, it is relativism.
My heart sympathizes with the boy who cheated and got kicked out, only to pass the exam for his father. And then, he confessed all the truth when interrogated and faced the responsibility alone of the act; bravely. His friend turned him in, but there was no grudge in him. Thus, there is, “So Much Unfairness of Things.”
The author’s profundity of idea must be culled deeply not only from the head, but more from the heart. The head could never explain what the heart knows. The head helps the heart in its function to interpret science until its boundaries, and the heart in its weakness, but the purity of thought doesn’t need the head and the desire of the flesh. The quietness of our thoughts matters, for a few moments of knowing reality and life’s meaning.
In my writing career, I’ve had my box of ups and downs. But for as long as I could write – no one could stop me. The stages of improvements make me flourish and rooted to the challenges that go with the pain of writing. And many of it pray for a vocation that would please GOD alone.
Everyone has goals in life and the path we tread are different. There are places that come scary so we fall and even hide. Writers who write about success share that man with his dreams must target for the sky or the mountain, so in case the arrow falls, it might aim somewhere in between than just down on the rocks. Truly, hard work comes with this metaphor.
And if ever there was a mistake somewhere, God in His mercy will never forget someone who fell and cried, but lift him up again. God has never forgotten even the sparrows.
In case unfairness of things happen, here are some advice that could help from the book “The Greatest Secret in the World” by Og Mandino: beginning a new life, persisting, greeting everyday with love, living the day as if it were the last, laughing at world, and multiplying values again.
Life is too short, it has to be lived well.
Rose Flores - Martinez
Roseprayers, blogs
3.29.2010
14.
Virtues Children Must Learn
Life is a merry-go-round, balloon and ice-cream children must enjoy; however at this early stage of life children must learn to differentiate what is good and bad. The adults are the good examples to the children.
1. honesty
Honesty in small and big things are the same. Honest children will be afraid to cheat others because they know that God sees them all the time. If the child went wrong, give good advice and don’t condemn; he/she will feel humbled when treated with compassion. He will not learn to steal.
2. kindness
Being kind and understanding to others, especially to the poor is a vivid example so children would understand the meaning of kindness. Compassionate words without malice will make them feel loved as they would to others.
3. respect
Respect comes with love. This will show all kinds of respect: nature, animals, things, laws, leaders, constituents, work, community. Let them know that everyone deems respect. If you respect others, others will respect you, too. Live a respectable life.
4. love
Love is for everyone. It doesn’t have a face as Pope John Paul II advised us while he was still alive. Love chooses no one and it cares for all. Love is a gift we all have and we could share to others. Love even your enemies, God will bless you much for this.
5. humility
A humble person delights God in all ways. If you are humble, God will add to your insufficiency. Teach your children to be contented. And tell them the truth that you can afford or not afford to buy something. With this, they will learn humility. Their lives will show/give more than what they could speak about. People will love them for this.
6. courage
Be brave. Tell your kids they will not be heroes, but they can attain their big goals if they try and become courageous. They need courage to work, to live, to be independent but loving others. Tell them they have something to show, and that in every problem they will succeed because God loves them so much and their lives have meaning.
7. diligence
Diligence goes with initiative and patience. This means studying/working hard and being busy. Big things can be accomplished in little things. Don’t worry, just move forward and never stop trying. When they study, they will graduate, they will find a good job, they can help themselves and others, too.
8. faith in God
If your children have faith in God, you will not worry much. Teach them to pray and tell God their wishes, regrets and goals. Their prayers are very powerful. If they grow to be faithful to God, they will live well. God has angels for them, and little miracles and great love. God is our Father.
9. thoughtfulness
Remembering people and telling them they were nice will make them feel happy. Remember saying “thank you,” as this is humility, too. If you remember people, tell them they will have many friends. Tell them to pray for everyone.
10. generosity
Even if you are the richest being on earth, if your wealth is not shared, you will not be happy. Life is sharing money, time, effort, work and talents, love, and prayers among others. God will reward them in heaven. Tell them to share to everyone even their work as offering. In the Bible, even the poor widow shared her last centavo.
Dear God, we pray for the children.
Guide them to be upright and loving.
Give them good health and a sound mind.
Let their hearts be pure despite troubles around.
As they grow up, let your angels hold them and
let good people surround them in their journey.
Blow in them your Holy Spirit for courage to fulfill
their tasks and live with joy.
In Jesus name we ask, Amen.
Rose Flores Martinez
July 22, 2010
Roseprayers blogs
15.
Secrets to a Happy Marriage
1. Make time to talk. Don’t expect your husband to knoe everything. Tell him what you want, what you feel. However, if you’re going to verbalize frustrations and criticism, be sure to praise your spouse out loud.
2. Set lovoing patterns. Make your just-married affection last forever. Show your love. Treat each other to surprise gifts, and make each other smile and feel loved; in this way, you may inspire him to pamper you, too.
3. Learn how to compromise. Marriage is a give and take system. Compromise is the key.
4. Accept that marriages are lie mirrors. If you scratch your spouse’s back, he will scratch yours. If you yell, the words will echo back your way.
5. Share a sport or hobby. Find things to do together. You’ll become much closer. The activity you share together can rejuvenate the relationship.
6. Divide chores fairly. Start to find a livable balance between each of your different standards of cleanliness.
7. Understand that marriage depends on how you’re doing. If both of your are happy and busy and confident, your time together will be more fun. But if one of you goes through a hard time, it will be hard on both of you. Try to be supportive of each other. Going through difficulties make you stronger as a couple.
8. Never hit below the belt. Fighting; it’s normal to fight at times, but don’t displace your anger. Keep your fight private. Marriage is fragile, give each other a reconliatory hug.
9. Accept each other. For betther or for worse, live up with each other’s attitude. You can also go on a spouse improvement. Remember that a positive reinforcement work better than nagging.
10. Don’t dwell on relationships of the past. Trust each other and don’t do anything to betray the trust.
All these, plus your powerful prayers can last your marriage a lifetime.
16.
A Diet That Maximizes Your Work Out
What diet best maximizes your work out? According to Earl ( Filipino health club manager of a 5-star hotel), a good diet after work-out should help to burn the fat. He recommends eating food that are low in fat (less 30% of the total calories intake) with carbohydrates and protein, and a mixture of foods that are rich in fiber. Earl adds that a good diet is very selective. For example, vegetable soup is better than “bulalo” ( rich beef bones soup stock). In the States, they don’t have “dinuguan” (pork blood with pork meat) and “kare-kare” (ox meat with peanut sauce and vegetables), two very delicious and tempting meals. “We Filipinos, and everyone, must be selective in our diets.”
The best exercises? Earl suggests a combination of cardio-vascular exercises that use strength machines. Other good choices are running, biking, walking, and skipping ropes. The workout must be at least 65-80% of the maximum heart rate.
For a stubborn abdomen, there’s no way out of it. You simply have to reduce your intake of fatty foods. Also, you have to exercise more and more. If you tend to live a sedentary life, then you will have to work out for at least an hour for best results. At the Tower Club, Earl says members try to exercise at least 20-30 minutes a day.
Earl notes, too, that there is some truth to the belief that dieting only leads to a loss of water and temporary weight loss. Instead he advises a selective, well-balanced diet combined with aerobic exercise (such as walking or running) for best results. He adds that when you exercise, you should reach the ideal heart rate appropriate to your age. If your prefer to work on a machine Earl recommends the cross-trainer, with an appropriate exercise program.
He adds, “Starving the body only leads to a loss of water – not fat. A selective diet is much better.” He also points out that there is a new trend – Iyengar Yoga, which was conceptualized in India. “Yoga is a good starting point for conditioning your body, muscles and joints.
Sample Fat – Busting Menu
Breakfast
Cereals with low fat milk
Hard-boiled egg
Orange juice
Lunch
Pasta with light sauce
Small amount of meat
Dinner
Fish meal
rose flores martinez
Dec 30 2009
17.
Wisdom and Leadership
How do some people manage to be richer and successful than others? What are the secrets they keep? What are the qualities and attitudes they have? What are the rules they follow? How do they work? These are only some of our questions about the challenges of business leadership.
A mythology has developed around corporate leaders, - that they were born with something special, something innate. In the 1700's, America was mostly an agricultural country with small pockets of industry driven by such men like Samuel Colt, Ben Franklin, and Eli Whitney, who were inventors. In the 1800's, business leadership was based was on the Darwinian theory of survival of the fittest. John Rockefeller and Cornelius Vanderbilt, among others, believed that business was about brute power and rules of the jungle, not about loyalty and cultivating employees . This unbalanced relationship between capital and labor created the labor movement.
There was the need for a change. Business executives became more conscious of their roles as leaders. Being able to guide means having a good sense of direction or a vision; it means going first into uncharted territory where others fear to tread and encouraging the troops to follow even through hazards block the way.
Faced with these challenges, many business taipans and leaders did not quit but trusted their gut and forge ahead. Many of them say it was sheer luck, for others it was hard work. "When one is young, one must work at least 14 hours a day," says Ramon, a businessman. "If you work for eight hours only, then how would you expect to climb the ranks? A mediocre worker lives contentedly but never reaches the top."
Another businessman says, "I drink coffee and sit in a restaurant because I finished my job when everyone else was sleeping."
Getting rich is not easy. A noted leader works 12 to 16 hours a day, traveled back and forth, and carried briefcases of work home every weekend to get his work done. "No one follows a weak leader," he says. "A person who heads a company should realize that his people have their own dreams , their own need for self-fulfillment. He has to help them fill their need as much as they do."
Many of the world's richest man, experienced adversity, many obstacles and setbacks on the way to accumulating their wealth. They pointed out that they were successful not only in coping with adversity but in turning it to an advantage. Plunging enthusiastically into the task of personal reorganization and revitalizing the company is a must.
According to Book of Wisdom, edited by p. Krass, the making of a good businessman, the foundation on which his career is to be built, must be the same in all respects as that of every good and useful man in a social organization.
In making of a businessman, and in the course of a business life, there are practices to be cultivated, things to be learned and habits to be formed that are most helpful to success. According to Theodore Vail (AT&T), the following tips are the most important:
*concentration of the work in hand;
*definiteness of purpose and thoroughness in deciding on a pursuit, and in doing and learning all that is necessary to be done;
*observation or a habit of noticing little things - instinctive recognition of anything wrong, or out of place. This is incidental to orderly habit or the result of them;
*foresight and precaution: There never was a successful leader who did not continue all precautions until the moment of success;
*self-confidence, without overconfidence or offensive egotism:
*respect for the unknown: In every undertaking there are difficulties that only a familiar and practical acquaintance can reveal;
*respect for the opinion of others;
*deliberation over new ideas. Many thoughts that are seemingly wonderful lose their apparent value when slept over, or imposed to impartial criticism;
*attention without interruption to anyone who is at all entitled to be heard;
*reciprocity in all affairs of life: Every exchange should benefit all sides, and
*one should always remember that the most successful men have started under discouraging conditions
A case in point of good business sense is that of a future entrepreneur, seven-year-old young Christjohn F. Abecia, says, "Someday, I want to be a salesman, maybe like those who own the big department stores." He borrowed a telescope from his cousins Wenzi and Riza, and the next day had fifty pesos in his pocket. Asked where the money came from, Christjohn amazed everyone when he revealed that he earned the money by renting out the telescope to his classmates on a field trip, for a fee. The idea is quiet extraordinary in such a young boy, who did the trade in good faith.
And a final tip: Never accept failure!
http://rfvietnamrose09.blogspot.com
Rose Flores - Martinez. April 2009
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rosalinda_Martinez
18.
REINVENTING ME
“The love of the body of a man or woman balks account, the body itself balks account. That of the male is perfect, and that of the female is perfect … I breathe the fragrance myself and know it and like it, the distillation would intoxicate me also, but I shall not let it.”
Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass
Many of us wish to look beautiful. We desire to insert ourselves and leave a mark of impression so we could be remembered. In our encounters with life we always ask the questions, “ Who am I?” “How should I look?” “How do I imprint myself a picture that would let others remember me and my uniqueness?” These questions bother some of us, most of us, and oftentimes, these questions prod us that primal desire to change what nature has decided we should have.
With methods ranging from a mere cosmetic makeover to more exotic touches like body painting, tattooing, piercing or more drastic solutions like surgical augmentations, we try to become a new person, even if only superficially. And we are not even talking about futuristic concepts like cloning, or any other yet-to-be-conceived means to create another bodily self through extraordinary reproductive means.
First, we were preoccupied with that part of our body that was quite open to change. History reveals that the decoration of the skin itself is ancient and elemental. Hints of body painting exist in ancient times using colors that have come to associate with blood, ritual and religion. Though today’s fascination with body painting seems to have lost that elemental purpose, it still harks back to what the ancients wanted to achieve – beauty.
It is quite evident that motivations are varied with regard to body decorations. Some see it as a way of initiating into adulthood a member of a group. Or calling attention to selected parts of the body, advertising one’s masculine or feminine nature. There’s a sense of belonging to be derived from it; also a sense of uniqueness. Simpler concerns would be wanting to feel good about the self, showing love and commitment to another person, memorializing a loved one, among others.
It could be an improvement – or a defilement of your own body. Whatever, there’s an effort to try to “personalize” the body, as if our own self wasn’t good enough. Surely, you must have seen men who’d have trouble walking through a metal detector as all the earrings, nose rings and studs on his eyebrows, lips, tongue, nipples, navel and genitals would set it off like crazy.
As for cosmetic surgery – that leaves a more deep and lasting modification of the body. Whether through augmentation or reduction – it’s there if you want to stay there. The historian Elizabeth Haiken traced the development of cosmetic surgery and although she pointed out attempts at constructing missing noses from cheek tissues in 600 B.C., the procedure was a recent phenomenon in acceptance and efficacy. There were attempts late in the nineteeth century to augment female breasts by injecting paraffin.
Now we have operations for just about every part of the body. Eye widening, liposuction, silicone breasts implants, face lifting, nose job, facial dermabrasion, hair transplant –it’s close to creating the Frankenstein monster. Yet the question will always have to be: How far can we look good in our lives?
/Rose Flores - Martinez
Published in Tribune Newspaper
19.
Thoughts: The Truth and Nothing But the Truth
The word honesty is a battlefield of arguments. As there are many fields of studies so are there fields of arguments about truth and lies and white lies. The definitions carry with it explanations and philosophies, even relativism.
A story about being bad or being good goes like this situation: Your daughter is raped in front of you by addicts. You don’t know what would be their next move - to kill you and your raped daughter or not. You were able to steal a gun from them. Would you fire the gun and kill them? How does relativism apply to this scheme of actions?
In a war, there is a saying that goes “Love is not fair in war.” What can you say about this?
Cards are laid to anyone in disparate situations. One has to gain enough wisdom to handle crucial matters. But then, anyone can fail, too. Trust in the Divine providence comes in again, there at the juncture near death – one would think of some noble intention for a great purpose. There are limits to human verdicts.
The truth is leaders are formed to serve. They can never be perfect in the eyes of everyone. Oppositions are formed to check on the leaders, or else the leaders are surrounded by supporters with different intentions: generous, selfish, unwise, impossible, traditional, extravagant, weak, wicked, slow, rascal, imprudent, impractical, dishonest, and so on as many adjectives as one can think about.
The truth is people are made of only flesh and blood, but with intelligent minds (educated or not) and the power of articulate language. The mind works in different ways as nurtured by factors the mould the human being ( seen and unseen). Test where you stand here.
The truth is honesty is a virtue, it can be learned, can be taught, and can be shared. More than anything – it is a gift that comes from God. On the contrary, some people deem to be loyal because they have wicked intentions. Notice the saying “partners in crime,” and “birds of the same feather.” Don’t forget how the Pharisee worked. Their deceitful conduct that hides behind an evil façade.
How about Matthew at the back pews? He was a tax collector and the public hated him, but he went discreetly in the temples acknowledging his shortcomings and tried hard in his heart and soul to purify his life.
The truth is honesty can be unreal, but real if you think of others first and yourself last. All honest intentions come with courage. But without the collaboration and support from each other and being united in a noble goal, progress would not be achieved.
What virtues are you living for?
20.
A Matter of Good Habits
Living comfortably is a matter of good habits. One doesn’t have to be rich to feel happy and contented.
Here are a few guidelines to make living happier, cleaner and easier:
16. Maintain a good standard lifestyle you can afford, even if you aim bigger than that. You have to be consistent with expenses, even if you get more income. The additional income can serve as your savings, or a portion for paying necessary bills/debts.
17. Maintain a simple, but clean home. Organize and fix all the stuff in the house and garden.
18. Garbage should always be brought out of the house, but compacted neatly outside for disposal soon.
19. Utensils have to be used correctly and wisely. It in not a rule to let only the visitors eat on new and beautiful plates, the house owners have a right to use it, as well.
20. Scrubbing pads in the kitchen/ for utensils must be changed as often as possible.
21. Old newspapers can be used instead of rags for absorbing wet spills on floors. It can also be used to clean window and mirror glasses to save on scrubbing pads.
22. Spray disinfectant and insect killer at least once a week or once every two-weeks.
23. Food are better stored in freezers. If there isn’t enough space, plastic containers with seal can keep food for some time. Watch out for expiry dates.
24. There should at least be two sets of slippers. One set of slippers used for indoor, and the other set of slippers used for outdoor.
25. Sweep, scrub and fix the house everyday – so dirt and mess will not accumulate.
26. Use the right fixtures that suit the house.
27. After using the toilet or/and bathroom, be sure to keep it clean.
28. Maintain dry rags. If rags are wet, it has to be washed.
29. Dry foams under the sun’s heat if necessary.
30. Discard/throw bottles, things that aren’t needed.
These tips are tried and tested by different mothers around the world.
Be clean, be healthy!
XXX000XXX000XXX000
This book is for You
With Love,
Rose
Rosalinda Flores – Martinez
Copyright August 19, 2010
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